Tomorrow at 5:00 p.m. it's official. After 10 years as Project Manager for Stroud Custom Homes, I will be laid off. It's not like I didn't see it coming. The end of 2007 showed the first signs that the housing market was going to tank in our area. I began to prepare. David began to prepare. We were not about to lose everything we have worked so hard for in our 20 years together. In 2008, in addition to working 60 hours a week in construction, I worked 4 other jobs. Last year, after being cut back to 20 hours, I worked 3 jobs. We saved, we simplified, we prepared. Yet, it still feels strange to me. I recently had a good 3 weeks of identity crisis, meltdown, and poor poor pitiful me moments. Who am I? What am I doing??? What will I do????? I find it funny how we associate ourselves with things like titles, stuff, and money instead of ourselves... our core beings.
What am I proud of? Well, out of 106 custom homes that I have built, there were only 3 individuals that I didn't like and I couldn't make happy. Of course these same 3 people were not happy eating a "Happy Meal" either and probably spent most of their lives being miserable human beings. I had great sympathy for their spouses. I'm proud that for the past 5 years in a row, the homes I have decorated and designed for judging in the parade of homes, have won first place. I'm proud that in 2008, the house I designed, won Best In Show out of 58 houses in the parade. I'm proud of the friends I made and for the fact that I've been a good, hardworking employee for 10 years, giving my job 100%. Can you believe in 10 years, I have never called in sick!!! Of course I did have a wretched migraine once and my boss had to drive me home. I threw up in a trash bag in the back of his truck. He will never let me live that one down!
What I won't miss...day's that started at 6 a.m. and ended at 9 p.m. Getting paid for 40 hours and working 80. Not getting the credit for the things I did and was responsible for. Never getting to take a real vacation. I never took more than 2 days off at once. I won't miss bookkeeping, taxes and insurance audits. I won't miss washing the dishes and cleaning the office toilets. I won't miss being responsible for the thousands of components and people that go into building a custom home. I won't miss the stress of construction that people think is easy, when in fact, it is crazy and crapola happens daily.
What I have learned. I love working with people, but I really, really, don't like being responsible for their work performance. I prefer to be responsible for me, myself and I as I always do what I say and live up to my word. I love using the right side of my brain way more than the left. Decorating yes, taxes, no! That loving what you do every day is so much more important than being an accumulator of things that you won't have time to enjoy because you work to much and you're just trying to fill a void because you don't have time to live.
What will I do? I'm not quite sure. I thought I knew, but now I'm not sure. I love stitching, quilting, bunnies, writing, organizing and decorating. I love to create in so many different ways. I also really love to talk! hee,hee,hee. My most favorite quote is this, "It is never to late to become what you might have been" - George Eliot. Now it's just trying to figure out what is next. Any ideas????
I will come home, open this bottle of wine and give myself a toast. A toast to the next chapter in my life and whatever that may bring. I think I will just focus on "living happily ever after" and making "plenty" of money. That sounds like a good job description.
The time is mine, blissfully I will go.
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30 comments:
You are one hard worker that is for sure....and it is good that you had the foresight to prepare..Good luck!!
Shell, you are so inspiring!! You are such a hard worker and so motivated!! I love your attitude and I know, only good things are in your future!!
Much love to you sweet friend!
Amy
Dear Shell, you've worked so hard and deserve a rest and your such a smart wonderful lady that I've no doubts you'll find your way and that things will work out beautifully, wishing you luck always. XO M. Hope you enjoy that bottle of wine tonight with much lofty planning with David and lots of snuggles from Sugie and Raz:D
Dear Shell:
I know you'll land on your feet, girlfriend, and it will be doing something you truly love. It's always the unknown that the hardest.
xoxo
Donna
Oh Michelle you are the second friend that has said the same thing this week. I know it is hard but God will provide. And you have such a great spirit about it. You are smart enough and have enough wisdom to know that there is another door waiting for you to walk through. I am praying for you sweetie. And, if you can well take a vacation girlfriend! You sound so busy no wonder you don't post everyday! Take care and keep us friends posted. On the up side you get to spend more time with furry the kids! Take photo's we love them.
I here for you girlfriend!!! I will toast with you in spirit at least!!! You will be open and ready for new adventures, I dream big for you....I see you in success and I can feel the warmth from your golden aura......
Your dreams will come true!!!
Maybe you could have a little time to kick back and relax!!!!
Hugs,
Margaret B
Well, so someone turned the page for you my friend, you are a talented resourceful woman use your talents and write the next chapter who knows it could be a best seller. hugs Miche'le
We shall all await your next report!!! Something good that way will come ... (hopefully it actually looks good!)
Good luck to you! It sounds like you prepared yourself well and have a great attitude. You'll do fine, and your next adventure will be a remarkable one.
You are ready for the next step - you've taken inventory, written your beautiful resume (in this post, no less!), and I'm sure that the knowledge you have gained will help you find the right direction to take!
Wow, you have such a great attitude about your whole situation. And you have so much that you have accomplished! Great job!!
Hi Shell, After reading your blog, it really hit home. I can relate to the building industry because I work for a lumber yard. I know that you are going to be doing things that you really want to do and won't have to worry about anything but you and David. You both sound very well prepare knowing it was going to happen. The way you write your blog, have you ever thought of being a journalist? I will keep you in my thoughts and prayers. You have become a very special friend.If you can afford to, why don't you take that vacation for longer then a long weekend. I have already probably made this longer then I should, but I can really relate to it. Take care and enjoy your new found freedom to do what you truly want to do. Your Missouri Friend.
Shell, I have confidence that you will find your way on this new path quite successfully.
Your optimism, strength and joyful living will guide you....
Enjoy the quiet schedule for a while though, you deserve it!
SheilaC
Congratulations Shell on a wonderful fulfilling career, made more apt by knowing yourself and your work colleagues/situation well - always good to see the whole picture even if it isn't the perfect picture you had planned.
I am sure you will continue to be successful in all of your endevours!
best wishes and good luck :)
Annette
I have no doubts that whatever you decide to do---you will be a success at. You have more ambition and creativity in your little finger than most people. I'll be waiting for the post that let's us know your next step. Take some time for yourself right now. Take care........ Hugs
congrats on 10 years! :O) I am sure whatever you tackle next you will be a success.. maybe you should become a professional organiser like that aussie dude that is on Oprah (when I get to see it).. I need me one of those!
Lissa
who's house is like a bombsite!
Speaking from experience - Don't just jump into what you thought you wanted - explore, look around, see what's going on around you. and then do what YOU want to do!!!! Or don't do anything! (well, that wouldn't work for me either, i can't do 'nothing') Either way - have fun! Congrats for a job well done :))))
Best of luck to the future! And if you get cranky, I know there is a wine out there called B*tch too!
Oh, wow! Sounds like a vacation should come first! With a spirit like yours, I'm sure you'll be successful at whatever you try next. And we will all be right here, cheering you on. Remember to have some bunny hugs with that wine. They make everything better.
Well, you look fantastic. So you have made the most of all this obviously, the stresses and the long hours. You have taken good care of yourself. And you shall continue to do so. Perhaps this means focusing on your creativity in the venue in which we know you. I had no idea you worked a job outside of your creations from home! I thought that WAS your job. So maybe that shall BE your job.
Brenda
Shell, I'm so sorry about your being layed off. But you have such a great attitude and when you find a better opportunity soon you will look back and laugh at yourself for ever being upset. I know how depressed I got when I couldn't find a job out of college, then got laid off from my first job. everyone's struggling right now, but with your amazing attitude and your wonderful family and circle of friends, you will be just fine. Enjoy your wine. Here's to you!
Shell, so sorry about your job; but I'm glad you have been preparing for this time. I have a friend whose husband has been out of work 7 months. It has given them time to reassess their lives and what they want to do (she works full time). I believe that when one door closes another opens and with your skills, talents and abilities I believe you will find just what you will need for this next phase of your life. For now, keep smiling and keep that positive attitude. Surround yourself with good things, family and friends. We'll all be thinking of you. Nola
Hi Shell, I am so sorry that this day has finally came. I know what its like. I too had a job that for nearly two years I saw a lay off coming. That is stress I promise you wont miss:) Celebrate your accomplishments and know that all will be ok. In fact better than ever. I cant wait to see where your new beginning takes you.
I have also been in the "crisis" mode for a bit, but coming out on the other side gives you alot of useful stuff you can now use for your future! Hugs always,,, Gail
As a fellow Michelle, I know you will find another job or create your own job that will able to use all your skills.
Tomorrow, have a nice drink. Let your first two weeks be a time to dream and plan as you go to the next phase of your life.
It'a about time you got what is yours! Sparkle away.
Sorry Michelle, I know what you're going through, I've been there. I agree with you that you focus on living happily and love your slogan;
If you can dream it .. you can achieve it! Dream big girl! you can do it!
I am so sorry to read this post. The economy is still bad even though the news tells us it's turning around. Shell, you look beautiful in the photo. It's that new color. Congratulations on the design for the best house. You really have a talent that you are going to be using in a new way. I know that!! You have great design skills. Can't wait to see what you do next. It will be great!
Lots of hugs!!!
Several years ago my job got bad and my parents got sick and I ended up having to take early retirement. It wasn't a good time for us financially and taking care of my parents was a year long process where I spent more than 3/4 of the year in another state. But I can tell you now that it was the best thing that could have happened to me. I not only had the time with my parents before they died (I am so grateful for that!) but I rediscovered myself. I had become my job and though I loved it that wasn't what God wanted for me. Embrace the changes. They are magical. blessings, marlene
Me again, apologies I am bombarding you with comments, but I have just read this post and had to say how much I admire your attitude.
I feel a bit like you... have certain interests but not 100% sure of direction.
I love the quote - it is never too late to become what you might have been.
You will be fine. I know this because your glass is more than half full. You are a happy person and you are inspiring to me. You have inspired me today. Thank you.
Love Charlotte
xx
Dear Shell,
You're a hardworker, and I know you will create more success for yourself now that you can devote all your time on it. I'm so sure of that! I also discover that I love using the right hand side of my brain more....heehee.
All the best to you, and I'm going to be cheering for you!
Hugs,
Pei Li
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