Tuesday, June 16, 2015
What I'll Take With Me - In Memory of Harrington
My heart is heavy and broken into a million little pieces. I can't stop crying. Friday night Harrington was happy and dancing around for his banana treat. At 5:15 Saturday morning, he was sick. I did all my regular tricks with pain meds and fluids thinking he had his normal abdominal issue that he gets when he sheds. Normally within 3-6 hours he is back to his silly self. But by 2:30 in the afternoon, he wasn't any better. So I put him and Hannah in their "To Go Box" and we headed out on our 2 1/2 hour drive to the bunny vet. Thank goodness David was with me.
The whole drive there, I was thinking it was odd that he didn't get better. He has never really been sick or had any issues outside of this. When the vet examined him, she said she needed to do an x-ray because his stomach was distended. I got a lump in my throat. The x-ray showed his stomach was three times larger than normal and it was blocked. The vet said it was probably a tumor and she couldn't fix it medically. Harrington would need surgery. Both the vet and I know that bunnies rarely, if ever, survive this kind of surgery. They are just too fragile. Even if they do make it through, the recovery is so hard that they normally only last a day or two because of the pain. Not to mention it would cost almost $3,000 for nothing more than losing gamble.
I decided I couldn't put him through it and I didn't want to get a call from the vet saying he didn't make it through surgery. I have received that call far too many times before. So instead, I decided to have one last group snuggle with him and Hannah. I kissed his face and told him everything was going to be alright. I wanted him to be surrounded by nothing but love as his light left this earth.
Sunday, while sitting on the floor crying and looking at my pile of things to be packed, I thought about all the things people have in life that they take from one place to the next. The little mementos, gifts and keepsakes. I thought about how one decides what is important to take and what will be given away or left behind.
I thought about how I never dreamed I would be facing such sorrow in the middle of getting ready for a new adventure in Wilmington. We were all suppose to be together. I especially never thought it would be Harrington who would leave first as Hannah is the one with an incurable disease. But, I guess you never really know do you? Life has a way of throwing a curve right in the middle of best laid plans.
So now, as I finish packing, I am reminded of what I'll take with me.... my memories.
I will take my memories of Bunnyville and Harrington and Hannah's corner office. How they inspired me to create the "Adventures of Harrington and Hannah" block of the month quilt and how people all over the world enjoyed making it.
I will take my memories of how he had ticklish back feet and hated having a pet-i-cure.
I will take my memories of how he could wear his ears up or down, but preferred to wear one up and one down. It will be my reminder of how it is always best to be myself.
I will take my memories of him and Hannah together. They were the best of friends and loved each other so very much. It will be my reminder of how much I love my friends and how much they mean to me.
But most of all, I will take my memory of how on August 28, 2010, a sweet little bunny named Sir Walter Harrington, came home with me from the rescue and blessed my life every day for almost five years.
I thought of you with love today,
But that is nothing new;
I thought of you yesterday,
And the day before that too.
I think of you in silence,
I often speak your name;
Now all I have are memories,
And your picture in a frame.
Your memory is my keepsake
With which I'll never part,
God has you in his keeping,
I have you in my heart.